1. My age is unimportant to you. Why? Because I say so - now shut up.
2. My sexual orientation is none of your nevermind. Though, I am rather straight. Okay, I am, in fact, unequivocally straight. Aaaaand, I am married to the most wonderful man in the world. No, really - he is. My husband also happens to be a kick-ass attorney. The best attorney EVAR.
3. I work in a not-so-bad gig. I am, however, searching for greener pastures to graze upon...should you find anything, let me know.
4. While my age doesn't matter to you...my birthday does. Mark it down on your calendar ------> August, 26th. Buy me things. [Thank you, in advance.]
5. I am not stupid. Random, yes. Stupid, no. Don't like it? Sue me. (I'm married to an attorney, so I could really give a rat's ass.)
6. My random, witty and sarcastic nature makes me the belle of any ball. Okay, maybe not the "belle" - perhaps the ... "cool-ass bitch" ... yeah, that sounds about right. I'm so cool, that I have to ward off the throngs of people who want to be seen with me. Uh huh - ward them off, I say. With flaming sticks. BIG flaming sticks. (I had to order them specially because I needed flaming sticks that big to ward off that many people.)
7. I am not this sarcastic in person. (Unless I'm tired.) (Or sick.) (Or awake.)
8. Don't forget to buy me things for my birthday. August 26th. If you need a postcard reminder to be mailed to you a week and a half beforehand so you still have time to go out and shop for me, that can be arranged. Feel free to email me.
The Short of It: I am Cat. I rock.
Cat's Words of Wisdom:
The dumber people think you are ... the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them. *********************************** Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening. Anything not fitting into these categories causes cancer in rats.
Everyone loves me. No, really. Check out this quote from a friend - -> "...you are officially my hero" - jspurlin